Today I want to talk to you about courage. More specifically, having the courage to try, regardless of the fact that there's every chance you will fail. This is something that I know I struggle with a lot and it's resulted in allowing other people to make decisions for me, knowing there is something out there I'd rather be doing.
I'm talking about university. You see, I live in a family that expect the best. Where any failure is such a disappointment, that it's better to not have tried. I wish I could say that I have been able to break free of this way of thinking, but the truth is, I now live my life in fear of failing. So, when my brother went off to university and graduated with a good grade, it was my turn to do the same. Add to that, pressure from my school to get everyone off to university and here we are..about to start university in September. It's not as if I'm dead against going, I actually think I will enjoy it, and I'll probably do well. The thing is, I know that there is something I would much rather be doing.
Musical theatre. Singing songs every night and playing different characters is something I've dreamed of doing for so long. Of course, I have never even attempted to do anything about this, because that would mean putting myself in a position where someone could tell me I'm not good enough. Even now, just writing this sounds silly, and if you knew who I am, you'd probably laugh too. Except I'm getting to a point where I think I might burst if I don't at least try. You know the feeling where if you don't do something you think you're going to go mad. That.
I guess I'm just really asking, how on earth does anyone ever find the courage to stray away from the 'safe' option and take a risk? Close your eyes and leap, if you will.
Speak soon x
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